Team Gray!

We stayed home from church yesterday morning because 1/2 of the children were coughing. At one point in the morning, I looked up to see our sectional almost filled with family.

It warmed my heart.

Joyous brought out a Little Bill book, and asked Curtis what it said. He read her the title, and Imani said, “I can read that.” Curtis said, ” I know you can. Why don’t you read it?” Imani was taken aback. She had meant that she could read the title, not the book! I thought that she could and should read the book, and Curtis told her to read the book.

Imani reads in fits and starts. She asked Curtis for so much help at first that I thought he was going to declare me an unfit homeschooler. Then, Imani started asking for the same words over and over again.

When she does this with me, I usually blow up at her saying stuff like, “what do you think?” or, “you have to start memorizing these words!”

Curtis just calmly said, “it’s the same word as the last time you read it.”

Imani trudged through the book. The book was about little Bill being afraid to sleep in his room because there was a thing with things on it in his closet. “Daddy, what’s that word? she asked. “Read it,” Curtis said. “I don’t know what it says!” Imani escalated. “That’s what reading is for. You read the words to see what it says,” Curtis calmly asserted. “BUT I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT SAYS!!!!!” Imani is screaming at this point, making an ugly face, with tears streaming down.

At that point I would have said, “Put the book away. You obviously don’t want to read right now,” or something to that effect.

Curtis was amused. “Read it,” he insisted. Imani cried for a bit longer, and then she quietly sounded out the word. “See?” Curtis asked. “You just read that word!”

Imani read on. “Daddy, what does that say?” “Read it.” Tantrum. Curtis said, “Do you think the thing with things on it said, ‘I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT SAYS! BOO HOO, BOO HOO. .. ” The whole room, except Imani, is giggling at this point.

Imani had three episodes, each one bigger than the last during this reading session. I got up to cook, or something, and Imani and Curtis eventually ended the session, book unfinished.

When I mentioned it to Curtis later, he said that Imani is so easy, because she lays everything out there. I think the phrase it ‘no guile.’

Who would have thought you could face the screaming beast with calm insistence and get her to do what you want her to do? Or maybe only her father can do that.

I am being nudged out of my comfort zone.

It is about time. Mentally, I’m stuck at two kids, but physically, I’ve got six. It’s about time I’m nudged the direction of manager. I mean, I’m spinning my wheels, otherwise.

This has meant learning to plan, which has got to be the most uncomfortable thing I’ve ever done. What if I don’t follow the plan? What if the plan doesn’t work? What if the plan is flawed? That means I can’t plan, and I must!

Instead I like to hold my hands over my ears and sing, “la-la-la.”

At brunch this afternoon, I watched three children to my right try to cut waffles simultaneously. Everyone was bunched up and uncomfortable, their elbows in each others’ faces. I told Xay to sit at the corner of the table by me to get more room.

When Curtis and I bought the table, it was huge in my eyes: it seats six, and we crammed it into a kitchen for two. Every trip in our tiny 2 bedroom house involved squeezing past that huge table in the kitchen. I would have much preferred a cute little butcher block table for four.

But I was very short-sighted. We moved from that tiny two bedroom house to our spacious four bedroom house with a bun in the oven. I’ve been having babies every other year since then. With seven of us at the table, we have no more room. And we have another baby who doesn’t eat yet.

Same thing with cars. We currently don’t have a car big enough for us all to ride somewhere together. We haven’t even tried it 70s-style. Remember in the 70s how we didn’t even have seatbelts, and a car seated as many as you could cram inside? Those were the days. . .

But I digress. This afternoon, I caught myself saying to Curtis, “What the old folks say is true. They grow up so fast. This table will be too small for a while, but then it will be too big, and then we can get that tiny table I always dreamed of.” To which Curtis replied, “I don’t know when that’ll be. Unless none of these have any kids. We’re going to need a bigger and bigger and bigger table.”

I have a problem. As much as I embrace each new addition to the family, I panic about all the added stuff each child requires. Curtis has been planning for this forever. He used to want to shop at Sam’s Club back when it was just three of us. We had peanut butter until it went rancid. We had the same humongous bag of dry beans for 5 years. I liked to shop for two and cook for one.

Curtis worked on me when I was pregnant with Yasha. He told me that if he was doing the shopping, it would have to be Sam’s Club. And I would have to go with him to see how to do that.

I had tried to go myself with the little children one day while the big kids were at swimming. I was overwhelmed by the sheer size of the store. I was on a recognizance mission: to prove that it was not cheaper than Meijers. I gave up with my price checking halfway through the store. At 8 1/2 months pregnant, I was overwhelmed.

I liked Meijer’s. I knew all the cashiers, I knew where all the rows were, I knew how to work the coupons, etc. But they keep raising prices. And they’re made for smaller families. Most people I know with large families shop at several stores for groceries, including Aldi and bakery surplus (used bread) stores. I’m not trying to go to 5 stores with 6 children. Not going to happen. So I agreed to go to Sam’s Club with Curtis and some of the kids.

It felt like a date. I was beyond happy to have the help, and for the first time in our life together, we had enough food staples. Curtis doesn’t have any of my hangups about *too much food*, so the prospect of getting enough, and even food to lay up in store was exciting to him. I was giddy by the time we finished shopping, and Yanni, who had stayed at home, and who had been doubtful about Sam’s Club, was thrilled at all the baking supplies. We bought 50 pounds of flour! Enough baking powder to last a year! 5 pounds of chocolate chips! etc. etc.

The exciting thing to me is toilet paper. I used to run out of toilet paper. For real. I felt like such a deficient woman, running out of toilet paper. (and paper towels and napkins and tissues, for that matter). Shopping at Sam’s means never having to run out of paper products. We even buy paper plates in large quantities.

In the Bible, Jabez prays for God to enlarge his territory. Basically, he asked for a blessing so that he could be a blessing. And God said, “yes.” I know how Jabez felt.

I loved sharing my birthday with my babies

Happy Love Thursday